20031128

tml's banner making day.joy.had such a tuf time contacting tjs cuz he's seriously lagging...maybe he's too beeg..maybe bp lags too..causing a greater lag time.heh.the day to my departure to the lands of the mong is about here...hope i get dark and skinny.i hope i have no mood to eat.better still.perish into the wonders of their agicultural land.retreat into my natural form.tml i hafta lug 1kg of paint and a clump of black cloth to sch.the pple are gonna stare at me again just like how they did just now.wth.it's only paint and cloth and a yellow oversized vanguard sheet.no big deal.maybe i looked like a karang guni.heh.o well o well i'm complaining complaining complaining...heh...this is quite fun...scold whatever i wanna scold...cuz i'm unhappy with everything...yes i m...someone told me and kept telling me that she is damn nice damn nice...o wtf..i dunno whether to feel guilt or unhappiness...i just don't wanna see certain pple that's all...not that i want it...i hate myself for it...i don't mean to act the way i do...i just do...it's natural...i don't understand...i don't even understand y i do stuff these days...that's y i need an answer...m i too determined in achieving my goal?...m i too stubborn?....i don't know...too tired to find out anyway.all i know is what i want.and in the process,i'm blind.i'm drugged.i don't feel myself today.i'm drugged by my facade.drugged.drugged.drugged.i don't know i don't know i'm confused i'm sick.whatever.headache.gna slp.slpg is good.it's the best dream.it's the only dream.one where i can escape.
all dolled up on 06:28